SKINNY BITCH

This no-nonsense, tough love guide for savvy girls who want to stop eating crap and start looking fabulous is soooooo funny. I totally recommend it. So if you can't take one more day of self-loathing, you're ready to hear the truth. You cannot keep shoveling the same crap into your mouth every day and expect to lose weight. Don't acted surprised! Smoking is for losers and so 1989 and totally uncool. Beer is for frat boys not skinny bitches. It makes you fat, bloated, and farty. Soda is liquid satan. It is the devil. Now don't go patting yourself on the back if you drink diet soda either. It's even worse. Sugar is the devil too. If you don't exorcise this demon from your diet, you will never be a skinny bitch. Coffee is for pussies and makes your breath smell like ASS. Whenever you see the words "fat-free" or "low-fat" think of the words "chemical shit storm." Are  you a pill popper and reach for over the counter medicine for every sniffle, ache, and pain? Toughen up. The Atkins diet. Hmm. Eat the flesh of dead cows, dead pigs, and dead chickens. Avoid fresh fruit. You are a total moron if you think the Atkins diet will make you thin. You are what you eat. Every time you put crap in your body, you are crap. It is a complete myth that we need a massive amount of protein. Have you ever, ever, ever, in your entire life heard of anyone suffering from a protein deficiency?  Have no faith: Government agencies don't give a shit about your health. So don't be a pussy and start eating the healthy foods you should be. These are just a few blurps that these self-taught know-it-all, former models talk about. So run down to the local book store and get a copy. They will have you in stitches.......